“Swing and a Miss” at Near to the Knuckle

I’ve visited more than my fair share of convenience stores. All of those visits have, thankfully, ended peacefully. That’s not necessarily the case for the characters in “Swing and a Miss”, a new crime fiction short story I wrote which the good people at Near to the Knuckle (follow them on Twitter!) were kind enough to publish.

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SPOILER ALERT: You may want to read the story (here’s another link) before reading the rest of this blog post.

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Now, I feel I must confess that the moral of “Swing and a Miss” has nothing whatsoever to do with violence. Obviously violence is bad, but we all know that already, don’t we? I wrote this story primarily as a platform to espouse the Arneson Equation of Pie Deliciousness (AEoPD). It goes like this:

Cherry > Apple > All Other Pies

The AEoPD corollary, focused on convenience store pies, is:

Tastykake > Hostess > Little Debbie > All Other Pies

Given enough time and the proper amount of publicity, I believe the AEoPD will someday take its rightful place next to the Pythagorean Theorem and that thing Einstein threw together about energy, mass, and the speed of light. If you’re a college professor or high school teacher, please feel free to incorporate the AEoPD into your curriculum.

And if you’re a maker of cherry pies, please send me samples.

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